Relationships - Going Along or Getting Along?

So many of my friends and family members are experiencing breakups at the moment.  I couldn't help but to write about the mystery of being in a relationship with someone.  Some think it will get better with time.  Will it or are you just fooling yourself?  Are you truly happy?  Are you living your truth?  

I've had my share of bad relationships.  I'm not judging.  I've stayed in relationships too long.  I tried to justify the red flags in my own head.  I lacked communication skills when I didn't feel heard or listened to.  I shut down.  There were times I had to have my mother make decisions for me because I literally could not think straight.

I'll never forget being yelled at for the last time as I lost my breakfast in the kitchen sink.  I'll never forget my best friend informing me that she and others found my boyfriend at the time on multiple dating websites.  I'll never forget what settling was like.  I'll never forget what lacking confidence felt like.  In a strange way, I feel grateful to have experienced these situations.  How would I know otherwise?  That said,  I've promised myself I will never succumb to or engage in any of these feelings or behaviors in a relationship again as long as I live.

It has taken many, many years of learning what works for me when it comes to relationships.  I'm still learning.  Relationships teach us so much.  We should be grateful when people come into our lives to teach us what feels good and well, sometimes not so good.  This is how we learn.  I faced my fear and started anew from the above mentioned times.  I retrained my brain with positive thoughts, daily intentions, supportive friends and family.  I let go of things that were not working for me.  I opened up and tried new things.  I had a vision.  I healed my body and my mind.  I acknowledged toxic relationships and rid of them.  I've grown tremendously.  Only then was I able and ready to enter into a relationship comfortably and excited.  I know who I am and where I stand at all times.  I engage in effective communication.  It's the best place I see to be.  I'm living my best life and I couldn't be happier.

Consider for a moment, the fear of starting over.  Can you face your fear and do it anyway?  What would it look like?  How would it feel to heal yourself and rediscover YOU.  Remember when you laughed, when you smiled, when the weight you felt in your chest was pure love for life and not the negative energy and dead weight of trying to make something work that isn't meant to be?  

You see as much as we would like to believe bypassing effective communication will work, it doesn't.  Going along just to get along is no way to live.  Is it?  Be open and honest with yourself and in your relationship and do what's necessary to get on the same page with your partner or take steps to start the next chapter of your life now!  I can tell you as difficult as it may seem now...it's all worth it in the end. I'm living proof.